Video Dating: How to Overcome ‘Stage Fright’


Dating has evolved over the years, and with the rise of technology, we have seen a significant shift toward virtual dating. Video dating, in particular, has become a popular way to connect with potential romantic partners from all over the world. For Americans looking to date internationally, video dating is an ideal way to establish a connection with someone from a different country without having to travel.

However, this type of dating can be nerve-wracking, especially if you’re not used to it. So, in this article, we’ll discuss how to overcome stage fright during video dating and provide tips on how to confidently date via video chat.

Understanding Stage Fright


Stage fright, also known as performance anxiety, is a common condition that affects many people. Traditionally, the term describes the nervousness actors feel when thinking about or performing on stage/camera. A very similar anxiety can arise when you are about to meet foreign women or men via video chat.

  • The anxiety and nervousness that come with stage fright can negatively impact the quality of your date, making it challenging to enjoy the experience or try it out in the first place.

It’s essential to understand the causes and effects of these feelings to help you overcome them.

Why does video chatting with strangers make us nervous?

There are several reasons why people feel performance anxiety before video chatting with strangers:

  • Fear of being judged

It’s natural to want to make a good impression on your date, but the pressure to appear perfect can cause anxiety. This fear of being judged can be especially pronounced when it comes to video dating, as you’re not only judged on your physical appearance but also your communication skills, mannerisms, and behavior.

  • Pressure to make a good impression

When you’re meeting someone for the first time, you want to present yourself in the best possible light. The pressure to be funny, charming, and attractive can cause nervousness, which can negatively impact your performance during the video chat.

  • Fear of being rejected

It’s natural to feel vulnerable when opening up to someone you don’t know well, and the fear of being rejected can cause anxiety. This fear of rejection can be even more pronounced during video dating, as you don’t have the benefit of physical proximity or body language to gauge your date’s interest.

  • Lack of experience

If you haven’t used video chats before or haven’t had much experience with it, you may feel nervous or unsure of yourself. The technical aspect of video chatting can also be daunting, leading to anxiety about the technology failing during the date.

Overall, performance anxiety during video dating is a common experience that can stem from a range of factors.

  • Many people struggle with these feelings when it comes to dating. It can help to tell yourself that the other person is probably experiencing similar nervousness and that being a bit flustered in this situation can be charming.

Additionally, with some preparation and practice, it’s possible to overcome these feelings of anxiety simply by becoming more used to the concept of dating in this way.

Overcoming Stage Fright: Tips for Confident Video Dating


To feel confident while dating via video chat, there are several tips you can follow. They include:

Prepare Yourself

  1. Practice Makes Perfect: Practicing video calls with friends or family can help you become more comfortable with the technology and the format of a video call. This practice can help you feel more prepared and confident during your video date.
  2. Set the Mood: Creating a comfortable and inviting environment can also help you feel more relaxed during your video date. Dimming the lights, playing some background music, and lighting candles can help set the mood and make the experience more enjoyable.
  • Don’t go overboard with the mood lighting, however, good lighting is essential for video chatting.
  1. Dress to Impress: Dressing in something that makes you feel confident and comfortable can make you more at ease during your video date. Looking your best from head to toe makes you feel assured and put-together, even if they only see your upper half.

Communicate Effectively

  1. Maintain Eye Contact: Looking away or down can make you appear uninterested or nervous, whereas maintaining eye contact can help establish a connection with your date, even over video.
  • Keep in mind, that to keep eye contact in a video chat, you need to look at the camera, not the video of the person you are talking to. You can try to place the video feed on your display as close to the webcam as possible, to appear as if you are holding eye contact while still looking at the other person.
  1. Listen Actively: Active listening is critical during any date. Listen attentively to your date and respond thoughtfully. Engage in conversation and avoid monopolizing the conversation.
  2. Be Yourself: Being yourself is the best way to establish a genuine connection with your date. Be honest, open, and authentic. Avoid trying to be someone you’re not, as this can come across as insincere or inauthentic.

Overcome Technical Difficulties

  1. Test Your Equipment: Checking that your internet connection is strong and that your camera and microphone are working correctly, can help you avoid technical difficulties during your video date.
  2. Have a Backup Plan: Having a backup plan in case your equipment fails can help you feel more prepared and less anxious. This could mean having a secondary device or a backup location with a strong internet connection.
  3. Troubleshoot Quickly: If technical difficulties do occur during your video date, troubleshoot them as quickly as possible to avoid losing momentum or becoming flustered.
  • Test calls with friends and family help you figure out which problems can arise and how to quickly resolve them.


Video dating is a fantastic way to connect with potential romantic partners from all over the world. However, it can be nerve-wracking, especially if you’re not used to it. Stage fright is a common experience that can negatively impact the quality of your date, making it challenging to enjoy the experience. Some reasons why people feel nervous before video chatting with strangers include the fear of being judged, the fear of rejection, and a lack of experience.

As with many things in life, practice helps you alleviate these feelings by allowing you to become used to the situation and help you troubleshoot quickly. Try chatting with some friends using video chats regularly before delving into the video dating world. By following our tips, you can confidently date via video chat and enjoy the experience.

Remember to be yourself, be present, and have fun, and you’ll be well on your way to successful video dating.